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"Oh My God! I am peeing my pants this shit is so funny!!!"
-- Chrissy, UCLA
"You have a stellar website! Its all around ISU! Being surrounded by corn and cows leaves us with a great desire for your humor! Thanks!"
-- Nick, Idaho State
"Tight site dawg"
-- Jerome, New York City
In response to all of the ritalin-popping, A.D.D. jackasses out there who say that some of our responses are too long for you to read, we're going to try answering a few questions with shorter, no-attention-span-required, straight-to-the-point responses. This will also allow us to respond to more of your questions, including some of the dumber questions that really don't deserve more than two minutes and twenty seconds of our time (from those of you whose SAT scores are lower than Barry Bonds' career Homerun total).
i've been promiscuise in the past, being kept all sheltered up, until i broke free and ran away from mom and dads home at age 18.... i had my fun, by having sex, 3-somes, and what-not, but now im kinda interested in this guy, but he knows my past as well.... i wanna ask him out, but ive fucked him before, and ive fucked his friends before and he gets what he wants from me...but i want more. hes not in a relationship, and i dont really know much about him b/c we're just sex-buddies...HELP! .
-- Dunno What To Do, Brooklyn Community College
Lions, tigers, and bears don't make good pets.
Sluts, whores, and promiscuous skanks don't make good girlfriends.
If you'll nail anything with a pulse and a penis, why would he want you as his girlfriend? He can just call you, get his rocks off, and not worry about dating or, gulp, cuddling!
Start fresh, find a new guy, and play a little harder to get. And buy a frickin' vibrator if you need to!
-- The College Guy
my black friend had sex with my mom and it totaly pisst me off. my dad almost killed him with a shot gun. lucky I took ALL bullets from him . my dad is in the kkk! what should I do?
-- Jose Martinez, USC
Clever story. But your name is Jose Martinez? And your dad is in the KKK? Hmmm, sorry dude, we're not buyin' it.
-- The College Guy
My boyfriend was away at college for 3 months and he hasn't call me or write me. Please help.
-- BabyGirl, High School
So your boyfriend hasn't called you in 3 months? BabyGirl, we hate to be the bearer of bad news (actually, that's not true, we really enjoy it), but he's NOT your boyfriend anymore (assuming he ever was). Unless he's lying in a ditch somewhere, it's a safe bet that he's moved on and you should too. But the good news is that we just saved $100 by switching to Geiko!
-- The College Guy
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